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LGBTQ+ Resources

January is Stalking Awareness Month

Sue Ryan, DCADV's Executive Director

Stalking is a pervasive crime, often used by abusers to harass and intimidate.  Stalking can take many forms including physically following, driving by or waiting for someone; using technology to spy on another; using social media to post embarrassing photos or to make implied or direct threats.  Because stalking can involve so many different tactics, it can sometimes be difficult to recognize.  This is especially true when the stalker uses what appears to be “romantic gestures,” such as sending cards, flowers, or messages of love.  To an outsider it may seem innocent, but to the victim this unwanted pursuit can be terrifying.

Because stalking is a contextual crime it is essential to consider the impact on the victim and not the intent of the perpetrator, which is always difficult to prove or easily disguised. 

Delaware’s current criminal statute protects against stalking behavior that creates fear of physical harm as well as stalking behavior that causes mental anguish and distress.  If a reasonable person would find the behavior threatening or distressing, then it is a crime. 

Often times a victim of stalking will be hesitant to seek help because they are not certain if the behavior is a crime or how they will “prove” it.  Because stalking can involve the use of technology or social media, victims may worry that they do not have the evidence needed to get help.  But, safety is the most important concern and so the Delaware Coalition Against Domestic Violence (DCADV) encourages anyone who is a victim of stalking to reach out for help by talking with a DV advocate or law enforcement.  

If you are a victim of stalking or you know someone who is a victim, there is help available.  Please call one of the 24- hour Domestic Violence Hotline numbers:

·      CHILD Inc.’s Domestic Violence Program New Castle County 302-762-6110

·      The SAFE Program at People’s Place II Kent & Sussex Counties 302-422-8058

·      Abriendo Puertas Bilingual Hotline Sussex County 302-745-9874

There is also a national resource center that provides training and technical assistance to first responders and victim advocates, operated through Aequitas, a technical assistance center for prosecutors.  This Stalking Prevention, Awareness, Resource Center can be reached at this website: https://aequitasresource.org/singleinitiative/?initiativeId=%207

Our Member Organizations

  • Alert! Computer use can be monitored.

    Computer Safety

    WARNING!

    If you are being stalked or abused, take steps to keep your abuser from knowing you are looking for help. Please use a safer computer, or call 911, one of Delaware's local hotlines at 302-762-6110 for New Castle County or 302-422-8058 for Kent & Sussex Counties , or the U.S. National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 and TTY 1-800-787-3224.

    EMERGENCY "QUICK ESCAPE" BUTTON

    There is a red Quick Escape button in the lower right-hand corner of every page on this website.
    Click this button if your abuser enters the room while you are viewing this website. It will close this website and redirect your browser to a neutral page.

    Clean up Your Online Path

    Internet Safety

    Everything you do online is recorded. It is IMPOSSIBLE to clear your tracks completely. Your computer stores hundreds of bits of information about everything you do with your computer, including information about which websites you've visited, your passwords, and what your emails say. An abuser can easily track the websites you visit or read your email messages.

    If you suspect your activities are being monitored, they probably are. Abusers are often controlling and want to know your every move. You don’t need to be a computer programmer or have special skills to monitor someone’s computer activities – anyone can do it and there are many ways to monitor your activities - even without having direct access to your computer. Using a separate computer is best, but you can protect yourself at home by familiarizing yourself with processes like private browsing, deleting your browser history, clearing your cache and deleting cookies.

    You can be tracked

    Your abuser can track your online actions – there is nothing you can do to remove your tracks completely. If you try to erase your tracks, your abuser might become suspicious.
    If you think you might be in danger, use a computer at a public library, internet cafe or a trusted friend’s house. If your abuser sends you email, do not open it on those computers.

    If you need help now, call 911 or the
    New Castle County Domestic Violence Hotline: 302-762-6110
    Kent & Sussex County Domestic Violence Hotline: 302-422-8058
    Kent & Sussex County Bi-lingual Domestic Violence Hotline: 302-745-9874
    US National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233
    US National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-4673
    US National Teen Dating Violence Helpline 1-866-331-9474

    Email Safety

    Email is not a safe or confidential way to communicate.

    Sending email is like sending a postcard through the mail. Anyone along the path can read what it says. If you need to talk to someone about the danger or abuse in your life, if possible, please call a hotline instead.

    If you must use email to discuss your situation we suggest you use an account that your abuser doesn't know about. Set up a new account with a free email service like hotmail, yahoo, or gmail.

    Password Safety

    Be smart about passwords to keep your abuser out of your accounts.

    DO NOT use a name or password that contains any identifying information (no names, nicknames, initials, birthdates, zipcodes, etc.) Instead use a name and password that contains a random mix of letters, CAPITAL letters and numbers (for example, HJ3v67Tn) -

    Make sure you can remember the user name and password. If you must write it down somewhere, put it in a place your abuser is unlikely to find it.

    If the computer asks if you would like it to save your password or login information tell it NO.

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